When you go to visit parents in their home, it may be a little more comfortable than hosting them with us, but even in this situation we must remember that the parents are examining and examining the couple’s behavior. This is more evident in a young couple, meaning that parents want to look into whether they are living well and there is no anger and bitterness between them, and to see if he respects her and whether she respects him properly.
Therefore, parents should not go when there is anger or quarrel or tension that is very difficult to hide. Parents have very sensitive sensors when it comes to their son or daughter, and they know how to receive messages even when no one is feeling. This is even more complicated when you reach the parents with your grandchildren. It is known that the grandchildren are not ‘porcelain dolls’ who do not move and obey every parent’s instruction.
Visiting Parents – Rules
Some parents are not careful, and do not refrain from criticizing the young couple, and sometimes in the presence of strangers. This causes murmur, anger and insult. The result will be that the couple will not want to come to the parents anymore and then the parents will also be hurt. Here is the place to contact the dear parents and ask them not to comment to the couple at all, and certainly not near everyone. It is possible to comment on the couple by way of a call or an optimization proposal, but not in a critical way that will disarm one or both parties.
It is recommended that referral to parents not to comment, be done through a third party such as a respectable uncle, or close friend of the family, etc., so that they do not offend their children who are allegedly commenting. Dear parents, you must remember that the young couple is allowed to make a mistake, so they learn. When they make mistakes and correct their mistakes on their own, they weaken and their relationship becomes stronger
`. The greatest gift parents can give this couple – don’t interfere! Only if they approach you and ask for your help with guidance and counseling, will you be able to, gently, answer and direct. And perhaps best, refer them to a counselor or marriage counselor.
in the jewish relegion respecting the parents is something that is most important, when a boy become 13 and has Bar Mitsva , he has to make his parents proud by respect them before 13 its bonus…